7 Reasons Not To Mess With Children
A little girl was talking
to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was
swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'.
The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'
The
little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally
walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing
was.
The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.'
The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what
God looks like.'
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, 'They will in a minute.'
A Sunday school teacher
was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to 'honour' thy
Father and thy Mother, she asked, 'Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?'
Without
missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
One day a little girl was sitting
and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white
hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of
your hairs white, Mum?'
Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy,
one of my hairs turns white.'
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come
ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'
The children had all been
photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
'Just think how nice
it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a
doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead.'
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the
blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, 'Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run
into it, and I would turn red in the face.'
'Yes,' the class said.
'Then why is it that while
I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?'
A little fellow shouted,
'Cause your feet ain't empty.'
The children were lined up
in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made
a note, and posted on the apple tray:
'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further
along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a
note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'
