I think we’re being
conned. The marketing men and women have woven a web of deceit that snares us like fish in a net. How come it takes so long,
so mind crushingly long, to pay for things. Yes, chip and pin is relatively efficient and means we don’t have to carry
pocket loads of cash but I have evidence that something else is afoot while we wait those few precious seconds at the till.
Our recent holiday (ah holidays,
aren’t they smashing) took us to Languedoc in southern France and inevitably we used a few toll roads to get there.
The debate in this country regarding the pros and cons of toll roads plays on as the government and consultation bodies decide
what’s right for us, ever felt helpless, overlooked and insignificant? I know I have. Any-hoo, back to the point; there
we were coasting along the autoroute and suddenly we are warned of ‘Peage’,
lots of barriers and pay booths loomed into view. Wanting to keep our precious Euros in reserve for more essential purchases
such as beer, wine, and beautiful crusty bread we opted into the lane with a glowing orange credit card above it. A couple
of cars in front stopped and paid then it was our turn and we pulled up to the barrier: my wife eyed the various instructions
nervously before inserting a credit card into the obvious slot (everything’s on the left remember so if you’re
flying solo remember to take a long-handled litter-picker so you can carry out the same procedure with ease from the drivers’
seat). No sooner than the card was sucked into the emotionless machine than it spat it straight back out and the barrier arced
upward with speed of a missile launcher on a warship, the hydraulics were awesome. At first we thought there’d been
a malfunction, that the machine didn’t like the flavour of our card but the barrier had gone up. What else could we
do but accelerate out of the ‘pay-zone’ and worry about it later, the machine had spat the card back out so quickly
it couldn’t possibly have read it and taken a payment, could it? Maybe the barrier had automatically gone up when the
machine had become confused by a British credit card bearing an image of small orange fish and we were the fortunate (puzzled)
benefactors of a machine glitch. Sadly no. Subsequent credit card statements prove that payment had definitely been taken
in the split second between insertion and ejection of the card. So how come we have to wait in supermarkets, petrol stations
and department stores like a guilty conman who’s been rumbled as we enter our four precious digits and pause while the
necessary connections and checks are made. What is really going on as we wait (nervously) for the code to be recognised and
authorised? Somewhere in a giant control centre with multiple high definition
monitors our expressions, captured by hidden CCTV, are analysed as our bank and credit card balances are cross referenced,
spending habits tutted at and fashion-sense criticised. If a system like the French autoroute can scan a card so efficiently
why do we have to wait like rabbits caught in headlights when all we want to do is pay and get going? Only afterwards as we
cruised further south through France did we realise that we didn’t even have to enter a PIN either. Hmm… makes
you wonder doesn’t it.
